Thursday, July 15, 2010

DATE #15: King Tut plays Piano

The only way to cure the uncertainty of one date is simply to go on another - but with someone else.

And to participate in an activity that is sure to be a distraction from any emotions at all - such as a trip to Times Square for the King Tut exhibition at the Discovery center, and what a discovery it was!

Picture me, rushing through Times Sq, late as always, pushing past the tourists waiting in line for their overpriced Broadway shows and pushing through the doors to the Discovery center in a rush. I burst through the doors and the place is virtually empty besides a tourist couple and my date, sitting with his legs cross, fingers tapping at his knee. He gets up to great me, and shakes my hand in a weak way and opens his mouth to say hello.

Now, I'm not judging here, but I got the distinct feeling that there was some disappointment in my appearance, as if he were hoping I'd turn out to be a guy. Yeah, I got the feeling that maybe he's gay and just in denial or still in the closet or trying to show his parent's he's making an effort... and I could be totally wrong about this, it was just a feeling - and he didn't check me out, I was wearing a low cut top and a skirt and he didn't once do the eye roll up and down.

He was however, able to feign an interest in Tutankhamun, the Boy King of Egypt. We took our tickets and entered the tour with a total of 7 other people. Our voices carried in the empty galleries over the ancient relics from Tut's tomb as we discussed our college educations, daily work life and the existence of aliens.

We discussed the possibility that in 1922, the discoverer of Tut's treasure tomb was really a talented production designer and fabricated all of the artifacts and used his tomb for cheap storage. We toyed back and forth with the alien idea again too, when you see the incredible detail in the tiny gold figures it seems humanly impossible to craft those fine details and for those of us who want to believe, the ancient Egyptian art seems like a good argument for proof of something other worldly. We walked the exhibition expressing ooohs and ahhhhs, not really reading the info plaques, more making up our own stories for the figurines depicting King Tut, his bride, his royal-ness... We raced to the end to see the real Tut, only to find (SPOILER ALERT) that he was a replica. A good replica of the mummified Boy King, but a replica none-the-less. After a few minutes rubbing his brass skull replica, we headed into the gift shop and probably spent more time there contemplating buying stuffed bear Pharaohs and pocket-sized sarcophagus's, we took the escalator up and out onto the street, back into the reality of Times Square.

As interesting as the exhibit was, it was pretty clear we didn't find each other as interesting as our new friend Tut. But in a good friendly spirit, we decided to check out a wine bar on 8th Ave. I was voting for the new Shake Shack but the line was around the block and not conducive to conversation.

We sat in the wine bar with the heat sweltering in through the open doors and he told me about life as a music teacher on the upper west side. Riveting, really. To me it seemed the best thing about being a teach is having the summer off, but for him, working at a snooty flooty upper west private school, the best stories were of students bragging about which rapper showed up at his Bar Mitzvah and comparing who got the best gifts - a yacht, a car parked at the Hamptons home ready for the kid to drive at 16, never mind the kid already had a driver... Stories of the grotesquely rich and their poor taste never gets old with me and for once I didn't have to talk about my glamorous life as a locations coordinator/wanna-be-producer. A relief.

We both drank rather quickly and were more than happy not to keep a tab open at the bar. We both, almost simultaneously, came up with the "I have some work to catch up on tonight" excuse and departed the bar in way less than an hour. He kindly walked me to the subway and we shook hands/patted on the back goodbye.

The whole time I was on the subway home, I was regretting two things only: I should have bought the mini sarcophagus complete with mini mummy for my purse and I should have stopped at Shake Shack for dinner....

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