As a girl, I've definitely had the time or two where I've stressed about why some idiot boy hasn't called me after a date or responded to a text message. I always tell myself it won't bother me or I can play that game and ignore them just as well as they can ignore me. But when a cute boy says he's going to call or text and doesn't, it's a pretty standard girl thing to flip out about it for a minute and loose all self confidence and control - that is until you meet the next cute boy and he promises to call.
I always say "I'd never do that", I would never NOT call someone back or ignore a text message....
What am I saying? Hell yeah I would!
One would think that guys could handle it, that if they ignore you, it's okay to ignore them, right?
The Climber (#10) texted me, a couple of days after our lousy 3rd date. I didn't respond. I figured he'd get it.
2 days later. Then he texted me again. I ignored it.
Maybe he thought the third time's the charm. And let me tell you - it wasn't. It was desperation, pathetic-ism. How come he couldn't get the hint? If I'm not responding to you, I'm just not into you! Isn't that the code?
His texts weren't just "how are you?" or "what's up?" they were paragraphs of "Hey, it's a beautiful day. What are you doing? Want to meet me and some friends for brunch on Saturday?" What would give this guy the idea I want to brunch with him AND his friends if I don't event want to respond to his text message!?
After the 5th text I politely responded: "Glad you're well but please stop texting me. I'm really not interested in any kind of intimate relationship right now with you or anyone else. It's nothing personal."
"How many other guys are you dating?"
"27. But I would hardly call us dating"
"Oh, yeah, me too. I'm keeping my options open"
"Great. Good luck. Good bye."
Memorial day weekend he texted me to invite me camping - camping for the whole weekend with him and his strange friends. I considered changing my phone number after that. Some people just never get the hint.
Tuesday, May 11, 2010
DATE #10: The French Say Goodbye Better
Obviously it's been a little while since I've written, and not for lack of material but rather a struggle to find the right way to express this particular experience.
This ladies and gentlemen is my 10th Date, and of my 10 dates, it is my third (and final) with The Climber (see Dates 6 and 8).
After our 2nd date I realized I felt relatively mediocre about this guy and didn't want to make out with him and definitely didn't want to take him home with me. Which for most people would be a sure sign that no fool would go on a third date, lucky for me I'm not most people though maybe a fool.
I thought, "Geez, you don't spend 9 hours on a date with someone, have a great time, and then suddenly there's nothing there?" I wasn't the only one to think so. All my friends, all of you, thought the same - "What is wrong with this girl!?"
I should know myself well enough to know that my first instinct is usually the correct one and I shouldn't second guess myself but I went on a third date with the Climber.
He wanted me to meet him at the Soho House for drinks and then we'd head to the movie theater to catch a Tribeca Film Fest flick. I was running late, not because I was busy but because I was watching an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer on Netflix and wanted to see make sure Buffy defeated the evil snake monster from Hell. She did. And I was late enough not to meet at the Soho House and instead we met at East of 8th, a bar/restaurant next to the Chelsea Cinemas.
I was so emotionally fatigued from watching Buffy save the world (and a major hangover from a previous night of drinking) that I decided not to drink when we met at the bar. Just seeing this guy for a third time, sealed the deal that this was not meant to be. All I had to do was fake nice for the night and it'd be over so I could go back to Netflix On Demand....
I had a ginger ale, he something with vodka; we sat surrounded by sexy Gay men and I think I sensed some insecurity from my date. He talked about his week at work and some swanky celeb party he photographed the night before. I listened to the Gay couple nearest us discuss the decor of their friend's new home in the Bahamas... He tried to touch my hand and I checked a watch that wasn't on my wrist. It was too loud in the bar to talk.
After our brief drinks, we got in line to wait for rush tickets for the Tribeca Film Fest. If you've never gone to a festival screening, the wait is long. To ensure tickets, you really have to stand in line an hour before the film and even then there is no guarantee you'll get a seat. We decided to wait for the French film MICMACS by Jean-Pierre Jeunet (Amelie).
For over an hour we stood in line. He talked and I imagined his head popping off and spinning round a few times, that would be more entertaining than whatever he was talking about. I noticed his iPhone, I've been considering the switch from Blackberry to iPhone for some time (and since have). On his iPhone he had an interesting quote: "Remember you are standing on a rock floating through space".
I thought for a second, that's a nice little quote, but then it hit me another way - what a morbid thing to say. Why would you carry around a constant reminder that you're insignificant? Needless to say, this struck up some mighty conversation, and mighty loud too. I took the side of "Well, I'm not insignificant!" and he took the "We all are!" We argued for about 15 minutes on the significance of being reminded that we're all insignificant - how is that a positive idea? If everyday you were reminded, like an alarm on your iPhone, that you're just a nothing standing on a rock floating in space - what would be the point of life at all? Wouldn't you just find the nearest bridge and jump? He said no, it inspired him.
Obviously a difference in point of view this huge means any relationship is doomed to fail. Which was fine with me. He continued to try and tell me that he just loves me and my ability to stand my ground. I just stood in line silently and watched a lesbian couple make out in front of us and thought, maybe this would be easier if I liked girls.
I probably should have left then but we managed to get the last two tickets for the screening and I really love Jeunet's films so we continued our fun on to the movie. Since we got the last two tickets, we also got the last two seats - metal folding chairs. He was disappointed the folding chairs weren't conducive to cuddling and I couldn't be more thankful.
After the movie (which was fantastic by the way), I should have just been my honest self and just told the poor schmuck I wasn't interested. But I didn't. I said thanks for the movie and slipped away in the train...
Don't worry, my consequences are coming.
This ladies and gentlemen is my 10th Date, and of my 10 dates, it is my third (and final) with The Climber (see Dates 6 and 8).
After our 2nd date I realized I felt relatively mediocre about this guy and didn't want to make out with him and definitely didn't want to take him home with me. Which for most people would be a sure sign that no fool would go on a third date, lucky for me I'm not most people though maybe a fool.
I thought, "Geez, you don't spend 9 hours on a date with someone, have a great time, and then suddenly there's nothing there?" I wasn't the only one to think so. All my friends, all of you, thought the same - "What is wrong with this girl!?"
I should know myself well enough to know that my first instinct is usually the correct one and I shouldn't second guess myself but I went on a third date with the Climber.
He wanted me to meet him at the Soho House for drinks and then we'd head to the movie theater to catch a Tribeca Film Fest flick. I was running late, not because I was busy but because I was watching an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer on Netflix and wanted to see make sure Buffy defeated the evil snake monster from Hell. She did. And I was late enough not to meet at the Soho House and instead we met at East of 8th, a bar/restaurant next to the Chelsea Cinemas.
I was so emotionally fatigued from watching Buffy save the world (and a major hangover from a previous night of drinking) that I decided not to drink when we met at the bar. Just seeing this guy for a third time, sealed the deal that this was not meant to be. All I had to do was fake nice for the night and it'd be over so I could go back to Netflix On Demand....
I had a ginger ale, he something with vodka; we sat surrounded by sexy Gay men and I think I sensed some insecurity from my date. He talked about his week at work and some swanky celeb party he photographed the night before. I listened to the Gay couple nearest us discuss the decor of their friend's new home in the Bahamas... He tried to touch my hand and I checked a watch that wasn't on my wrist. It was too loud in the bar to talk.
After our brief drinks, we got in line to wait for rush tickets for the Tribeca Film Fest. If you've never gone to a festival screening, the wait is long. To ensure tickets, you really have to stand in line an hour before the film and even then there is no guarantee you'll get a seat. We decided to wait for the French film MICMACS by Jean-Pierre Jeunet (Amelie).
For over an hour we stood in line. He talked and I imagined his head popping off and spinning round a few times, that would be more entertaining than whatever he was talking about. I noticed his iPhone, I've been considering the switch from Blackberry to iPhone for some time (and since have). On his iPhone he had an interesting quote: "Remember you are standing on a rock floating through space".
I thought for a second, that's a nice little quote, but then it hit me another way - what a morbid thing to say. Why would you carry around a constant reminder that you're insignificant? Needless to say, this struck up some mighty conversation, and mighty loud too. I took the side of "Well, I'm not insignificant!" and he took the "We all are!" We argued for about 15 minutes on the significance of being reminded that we're all insignificant - how is that a positive idea? If everyday you were reminded, like an alarm on your iPhone, that you're just a nothing standing on a rock floating in space - what would be the point of life at all? Wouldn't you just find the nearest bridge and jump? He said no, it inspired him.
Obviously a difference in point of view this huge means any relationship is doomed to fail. Which was fine with me. He continued to try and tell me that he just loves me and my ability to stand my ground. I just stood in line silently and watched a lesbian couple make out in front of us and thought, maybe this would be easier if I liked girls.
I probably should have left then but we managed to get the last two tickets for the screening and I really love Jeunet's films so we continued our fun on to the movie. Since we got the last two tickets, we also got the last two seats - metal folding chairs. He was disappointed the folding chairs weren't conducive to cuddling and I couldn't be more thankful.
After the movie (which was fantastic by the way), I should have just been my honest self and just told the poor schmuck I wasn't interested. But I didn't. I said thanks for the movie and slipped away in the train...
Don't worry, my consequences are coming.
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